This Mask I Hide Behind
by Sailor Ghost
Summary: Kunou reflects on his life and his friendship(?) with Nabiki. This is my first serious fic AND my first Ranma one as well! Be gentle when reviewing ^-^


This Mask I Hide Behind

This Mask I Hide Behind...

**Disclaimer:** I just wanted to put a different spin on Kunou-chan because I don't really think he's such a bad/idiotic/bumbling guy. Oh, and you may notice that he talks like a *gasp* _normal_ human being with at least some grasp of intelligence here - that's because I wanted to spare my sanity AND your sanity...do you really want to read 4 pages of Shakespearean jargon? YES, I am a Kunou x Nabiki-shipper, and her thoughts are interspersed throughout (well, it's sort of a mushy story, anyways...) I tried to keep her, at least, In character. Please enjoy ^^ 

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"So long, Kunou-chan. Thanks for stabilizing my financial future." 

"It doth make me shudder to think all your future business ventures may involve the defrauding of wealthy individuals, Nabiki Tendo."

"I shudder to think that all my future victims may have your mental capacity." She shoots me a smug grin and lets herself out, leaving me to shut the door behind her. Sighing, I lean my back against the heavy door and glimpse at the pictures of Akane and the no longer mysterious pig-tailed girl bent in my clenched fist. _Why the hell am I still doing this?_ I've asked myself every day as I ask myself now. 

Why the hell AM I still doing this? It took me a good two years to realize that my relentless pursuit of both Akane and Ranma's cursed form would never amount to anything, and now that they've finally admitted their love for each other...

I tear the crumpled pictures to shreds. Who cares if I blew 5000 yen on them? They're only reminders of two years lost to unreachable goals. As I approach my room, my memory is filled with images of Akane and Ranma and how foolish I was to waste my life on them. The walls of my bedroom are wallpapered with their likeness and, one by one, I rip the photographs down from their positions, cursing them both under my breath, until my walls are a barren, naked white. I am now ankle deep in the tatters of my former life - the mask I hid behind since everything I had known blew up in my face...

The trigger was my mother's unexpected death, after which my father took off for Hawaii just as suddenly. Everything went downhill from there. My sister, who had always straddled the line, went totally psychotic, turning on others only after she had finished taking the pain onto herself. But she was always too proud to finish the job...and now she always wears long sleeves to hide the scars - the scars only she and I know of, stemming from the pain we mutually share. After that, I couldn't take it anymore and chose to live in my own dreams and desires. Who cares if they were unrealistic or improbable? They were my dreams, and much easier to bear than the harsh reality fate had dealt me. Needless to say, that Tatewaki Kunou was unbearable to live with due to his unfaltering idealism, and one by one my friends drifted away until I was left with only one, who had changed for the worse.....

It's hard to remember the times before - when she didn't let herself get corrupted by money. Her mother had passed away a few years before mine, and her metamorphosis from the innocent, wide-eyed playmate on whom I had, admittedly, a crush on since I was in second grade, to a caustic, unfeeling loan shark. And even when I squandered away two years on Akane and the pigtailed girl...Nabiki was always there, lurking in the back of my mind. While I had sincerely loved Akane and Ranma-chan, and had made them a pivotal part in my hopes and dreams for a happier life, Nabiki was the outlet for my loneliness. Sure we fought and spat more often than most friends, but she always stuck around to make a quick buck, and I did not mind buying the overpriced photographs from her. To me, it was money well spent - anything to combat the loneliness I still face day in and day out. I know she'll be back tomorrow to try and acquire even more of my finances. It's not a bad investment, because for once I have companionship - something that died along with my mother. And I want to be lonely no longer...

The house is heating up quickly. Who knows what sorts of poisons or concoctions my sister is heating up downstairs in the kitchen? As I slowly unbutton my shirt, I catch a glance of my bare torso in my mirror. Funny, I don't seem to remember my stomach being that flat. Or my chest barreling out ever so slightly like that. Must be all the kendo I've been doing lately to get my mind off things. 

Funny how my emotions can't catch up to my body.

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I figure that what with Akane and Ranma finally hooking up, Kunou's gonna either be really depressed or really desperate to get his hands on more photos. Either way, business is going to be slow. It seems like my sister and her fiancee are on to my little scheme. I'm actually starting to feel a little bad for Kunou-chan...the last few times I went over to his place, he seemed a little....lost. Downcast, even. Maybe I should give him a discount or something, he really needs someone right now...

Hey, the Ice Queen can be merciful when she needs to be! 

"Nabiki, you have a gentleman caller!" I hear Kasumi's soft voice paging me. 

Oooooo...a gentleman caller! Another sucker, another yen. "Send him in!" I reply. I can hear footsteps in the hallway, and my door slowly opens.

"Nabiki...?"

"Beat it, Kunou, I'm expecting a _gentleman_ caller, not you." I can already tell that was a mistake. His eyes are cast to the floor instead of a witty, poetical reply. 

Eyes still to the floor, he thrusts a boquet of blood red roses into my arms. "These are for you..." he whispers, almost to the point of inaudible.

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She looks surprised. Not many people are used to seeing Tatewaki Kunou without his clueless, womanizing mask on. And to me, he's now as dead as my sister's pet rabbit.

"Kunou-chan...I...don't understand....."

As I had prayed they wouldn't, the tears start flowing freely. This is only the third time in my life I've cried. And now, everything I've ever held inside comes tumbling out to someone who grew apart from me a long time ago...The grief over my mother's death, my phony exterior, even my sister's emotional and physical scarring. 

She watches me, silent, and strangely enough, with a glimmer of compassion in her eyes. And before I know it, I've pulled her into my arms. My tears dampen her hair, yet she still leaves her head on my shoulder. "Nabiki...I can't stand being alone..." I whisper to her. "I don't want to be lonely anymore..."

"Kunou...you don't have to be..." I can feel my shoulder moistening. Nabiki isn't as coldhearted as many of our peers believe. She has feelings, she just hides them behind her icy exterior, much like I hid behind my airheaded facade. 

I realize now that I only had to wait a few years...until my dream became a reality. Those two years were not fully wasted. I finally have someone, and she was here before me all this time.

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I guess the old saying not to judge people by their covers is true. If I had known what was inside Tatewaki Kunou, I never would have abused him so much. If I had known, two years later, that he'd be in my room spilling his guts to me...I probably would have been a better friend. 

Now that I'm standing here with him, I notice how attractive he really is. Tall and well built with broad, square shoulders, slightly wavy black hair frames his handsome, intelligent-looking face. And all this time I passed over his looks for his money.

It's funny how people change. Ten minutes ago, I probably would have slapped Kunou-chan across the face, but now my personal view has changed because of these enlightening revelations. I'm startled that he thought of me as someone to go to in a tough situation. Don't get me wrong - I don't love him - at least just yet. But I'm sure I can learn to in the next few weeks. After all I owe him for taking advantage of our friendship. I know my heart really is made of ice. Not only is it cold, it melts when exposed to something warm.


End file.
